12 Best Tips on How to Do Soul Searching

If you are living without a clear purpose, be easy on yourself.  Very rarely do people know their life purpose clearly.  Even if you know your life purpose now, a year later, you may be able to make it even more clear or you may even want to redefine it.  To find your purpose requires some soul searching.  Yet, soul searching is not only useful when you need to find your purpose.  It is also useful when you are not feeling right emotionally.  

Whis Is Soul Searching and When to Do It?

Soul searching basically means self talking, preferably at a very deep level.  There are lots of different scenarios when you want to do soul searching.  In fact, it would be nice if you can have a healthy self talk with yourself everyday.  In this article, we will focus on two scenarios:

1. When you need to find your life purpose
2. When you are not feeling well emotionally

Now, let’s explore some useful ways to do some soul searching for the above scenarios.  

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #1: Think About What You Like to Do as a Kid

There is a good chance that what you liked when you were a kid is what you actually have a different kind of love for.  Let’s say you like to do computer programming as a kid a lot.  It could be that you just naturally love playing around with logic and calculation and being a computer programmer can give you a sense of joy.  

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #2: Think About What You Were Good at as a Kid

There are also things that you were naturally good at when you were a kid.  You might have been really good at writing.  It is kind of interesting that you might find that what you were good at was also what you liked to do.  That’s a big clue on what you should be doing as a career.  

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #3: Ask Yourself What You Would Do If Money is Not a Concern

Now, go back to the present.  Ask yourself what you would do even if you are not getting paid.  What would you do at night if you are alone and you don’t have access to your phone or the internet?  Are you going to take pictures?  Are you going to draw?  Are you going to write?  

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #4: Ask Yourself What You Are Better Than Most People at

Let’s now go back to the present.   What are you better than most people at?  If you can’t find the one thing that you are good at easily, think about what you were good at or interested in as a kid.  You don’t need a lot of passion at this moment.  You can develop love for that one thing you are good at.

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #5: Find the One Thing that You Are Good at and Has Some Interest in

So now, you know what is the one thing that you are good at.  As long as you have some interest in it, you are going to be fine.  As you get better and better at it, you will get more passion for it.  

Soul Searching for Life Purpose - Tip #6: Think of a Way to Get Paid by Doing What You Are Good At and Has Some Interest in

The final question is whether you can get paid by doing the one thing that you are good at and have some interest in.  In some cases, you have to be creative as you may need to give it a little twist.  For example, if you are good at writing but your stories don’t sell, try writing a non-fiction book or writing blog posts.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #1: Focus on the Present Moment

“The present moment is all you ever have. There is never a time when your life is not ‘this moment’.” - Eckhart Tolle

Now, let’s look at what it looks like to do soul searching when you are not in the right place emotionally.  Remember that all we have is the present moment.  The past has passed.  The future is not yet here.  The present moment is a very short period of time where not much can happen.  Therefore, there is not much that can make you unhappy at the present moment.  It must be the past or the future that makes you unhappy.  If it’s the past, let yourself know that you can’t change the past.  If it’s the future, let yourself know that you can’t have total control of the future and you can only do your best to guide a better future.  If you have done your best, that’s the best you can do.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #2: Understand That You Are Not Your Thoughts

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.” - Stephen Covey quoting an unknown author in his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”

You have to understand that your thoughts are mostly random thoughts and knee-jerk reactions.  That’s just how our minds work.  Instead of blaming ourselves for having negative thoughts, understand that we are not our thoughts and observe the thoughts.  Be the observer.  You will be able to create a little bit of space between yourself and your thoughts.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #3: Understand That the World Is Full of Randomness

Don’t blame yourself for something bad that has happened.  The world is full of randomness.  It’s good to be responsible but don’t make yourself feel like you have full control of everything surrounding you.  Remember that you can only do your best.  A good decision that resulted in a bad result was still a good decision.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #4: Meditate

If you need to calm your mind and think clearly, you should meditate to keep your mind quiet enough.  Your mind can probably never be almost quiet.  Just make it as quiet as you can possibly make it thru meditation.  You will then find the space to think clearly and do some honest self-talking.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #5: Long Walk

If you find meditating too difficult, try doing a long walk.  Having a 30-minute walk can very effectively clear your mind.  Don’t listen to music or check your phone when you are walking.  If you have to, listen to calming music that has no lyrics.  

Soul Searching for Removing Negative Emotions - Tip #6: Walking Meditation

A very effective way to meditate, for those who don’t like to do sitting meditation, is to do walking meditation.  Just synchronize your steps and your breathing in and out.  Keep your walking and breathing at a normal speed.  You may want to breath in for 3 steps and breath out for 3 steps.  It would be like breathing in, step one, step two, step three, breathing out, step one, step two, step three.  It’s different for everyone.  Just find your natural speed for breathing and walking.  Some people may like to breath in for 4 steps and breath out for 3 steps.